Bittersweet honesty

When I was married I used to think it must be great fun to be single. Now that I'm single, I think how nice it would be to be married again. Someday. To the right person. When you've lived enough life you know that there are many Mr/Ms. Wrongs out there on the path to finding Mr/Ms. Right. As we move along from person to person, it's like we're trying on jackets: should we keep wearing the tailored suit or move on to something less structured? Should we stay with a classic solid black or look at a navy pin-stripe? Maybe we should shun suits altogether and go business-casual constantly. Maybe we should wear Birkenstocks to the office. Maybe we should never wear Birkenstocks again.

Sometimes, as we're walking down this road of relationships, we start to think that our string of bad luck is a reflection of something we're doing wrong. I don't think so. I think that when something is right, there is nothing you can do to make it go awry.

Know this: you deserve someone who wakes up each day (or most days) happy to be lying next to you. You deserve someone who looks forward to your calls, who wonders when he'll get to see you again. You deserve someone who will ask you into his life, who will make room for you to join along-side him in his adventures, who will kiss you goodnight and wish you sweet dreams. You deserve someone who will love you for you- all of you- the good and the bad and the messy and the lovely and the right-before-bed and the first-thing-in-the-morning and the bad-breath and the breathless-moments and the sunsets and the flowers blooming and the everythings-coming-up-roses feelings and the world-is-falling-apart-but-at-least-we've-got-each-other times. He will not be perfect. You will not be perfect. But you will embrace the imperfections in each other and love each other anyway. For just a minute you may have lost your faith that you will find him, but I will hold it for you. It will happen for you. I just know it.

After all, this is the life.

-a

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