Regina Brett in her book "God Never Blinks" says "If you have resentment you want to be free of, pray for the person you resent and you will be free." Seems counter-intuitive and yet, it's true. When we ask for only good things to come to those we dislike or feel ill-will towards, we are set free. It's when we keep feeling those negative feelings that we remain tethered to the other person. Resentment is like a boomerang, the feelings you send out to the other person are re-sent back to you. Directly.
Wishing well for someone who has wronged you or hurt you or left you is not easy but the results are amazing. There are times when I have to close my eyes and breathe and hope for the ability to just get through the moment without breaking down; it's those times when wishing the other person well seems too monumental a task to even begin. And yet, even if I don't feel it in that moment, I will say to myself "I wish him well." Just those 4 simple words "I wish him well."
There is a voice inside that seems to rebel against that- that doesn't want to let go of the anger, that doesn't want to be kind or gentle. That voice is a voice of protection. That voice represents a part of me that wants to ensure that I don't get hurt again and that wants to put up defenses and that wants to fight and remain hard and steadfast. The irony is that the best defense against that sadness and anger is peace, not more anger.
Wishing someone else well frees your connection to that person. You wish them well so that they can leave your heart and your soul and go on their own path without you needing to follow. You wish them well so that you can take all of the energy you are spending on that person and use it instead to push yourself forward. You wish them well so that you can concentrate on your own life and your own dreams and you are no longer concerned or consumed by what's going on in someone else's life. You wish them well so that you can release them and release yourself and charge out into your future on your terms. You wish them well and you are free.
After all, this is the life.
- a
Wishing well for someone who has wronged you or hurt you or left you is not easy but the results are amazing. There are times when I have to close my eyes and breathe and hope for the ability to just get through the moment without breaking down; it's those times when wishing the other person well seems too monumental a task to even begin. And yet, even if I don't feel it in that moment, I will say to myself "I wish him well." Just those 4 simple words "I wish him well."
There is a voice inside that seems to rebel against that- that doesn't want to let go of the anger, that doesn't want to be kind or gentle. That voice is a voice of protection. That voice represents a part of me that wants to ensure that I don't get hurt again and that wants to put up defenses and that wants to fight and remain hard and steadfast. The irony is that the best defense against that sadness and anger is peace, not more anger.
Wishing someone else well frees your connection to that person. You wish them well so that they can leave your heart and your soul and go on their own path without you needing to follow. You wish them well so that you can take all of the energy you are spending on that person and use it instead to push yourself forward. You wish them well so that you can concentrate on your own life and your own dreams and you are no longer concerned or consumed by what's going on in someone else's life. You wish them well so that you can release them and release yourself and charge out into your future on your terms. You wish them well and you are free.
After all, this is the life.
- a
Good stuff. Recognizing, understanding, and coming to terms with the inner "protector" in our lives, and how not to be enslavened to it, can help us get unstuck.
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