So for all of my talk of embracing the present and looking to the future with hope, here's the only catch: I'm impatient. I'm ready for my future to get here already. I'm ready for my white knight to ride in on his horse. He doesn't even need to be a knight. He doesn't even need to ride a horse honestly, he just needs to be really into me and I need to be really into him. Is that too much to ask?

I'm leaping into my life with verve and getting back in the game and getting back on track. I'm taking the reigns and I'm riding this wave of excitement right on into the future. So if the future could get here right now, please, I'd appreciate it. It's easy to talk about jumping into life and enjoying every morsel of what it has to offer; to take the good and the bad and wrap them all up and hug them in close and bring them into yourself and your soul and enjoy the moment. But the thing is, that feeling, as good as it is, can only last for so long... and then you're ready for some results.

You're ready to meet someone new and make a difference in your life, in the lives of those you care about, in the lives of those you haven't even met yet. Taking on your life on your terms, in your hands, is thrilling and empowering and delightful and yet there is only so much control we have. I can do a lot for myself and I can put myself out there and I can make myself available, but I can't make my Mr. Right walk through that door any faster. I can't make the future get here any sooner than it's moving toward me right now. And that drives me crazy.

But I'll take a breath, and I'll keep a hold of those reigns and I'll keep my sights set ahead and I'll look at where I am now, and I will smile, and I will try to let go.... and believe. I believe good things are coming and I believe I will fall in love and I believe I will touch lives and make a difference and make the best of it and make it all worthwhile. I believe it will happen. I just wish it would happen already.

After all, this is the life.

- a