Being found

Sometimes it feels as if we're fighting our way through the day. A flight is delayed, a voicemail is not returned, the work week looms ahead. We want to stay present. We want to appreciate the day for what it is: sunny and comfortable without any outward signs of struggle. But we feel discontented and we feel impatient and we feel as if we're waiting for life to begin, for love to come and success to come and contentment and happiness to come and rest in our laps.

And when it doesn't come as easily as we'd like, we try to push things to happen. Try to push someone to respond, try to push our careers ahead, try to push our family to see things from our point of view. But maybe we're creating the struggle ourselves. Maybe the key is to put down our fists and take down our defenses and withdraw from the struggle to have life be a certain way. Maybe the key is to let life find us, and to let ourselves be found.

Letting life find us is not as easy as we'd like to think. We want to be in control and be in the driver's seat and make our own destiny. We want to know and to feel that we are not simply at the whim of the universe, that we have a say, that we have a choice. And yet, many times, our choice is to be content with what is in our lives right now. Our choice is to be in the driver's seat of the life we have now; our choice is to make the decision to live as best we can and as fully as we can and to embrace it all as it stands right now. And we may decide it's not enough and we may decide it's not what we want and we may decide we are seeking and searching for something other than what we currently have. But forcing it to be different will not make it so. Feeling unfulfilled and feeling unsatisfied and feeling uncomfortable will not make our dreams happen any sooner. Certainly we need to make decisions in our best interest and for our future and for what we want, but we should also understand and appreciate that sometimes the best we can do is to let life walk in our door and to welcome it when it does.

And the funny thing about life walking in is that sometimes we are not ready for it. We think we know what we want but when we are faced with it, we shut down. So maybe the other key is to make sure that when life does bring us what we're searching for, we need to let ourselves be found. We need to keep an open heart and mind to see what's in front of us. We need to be unafraid of our dreams coming to fruition; we need not be scared of truly embracing love and friendships and peace when it comes our way. We need to appreciate that we are as open as we allow ourselves to be, and when our prayers are answered and when we open our eyes to what has arrived, we need to accept that we are worthy and we can be happy and we can be loved.

After all, this is the life.
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