Don't take it personally

If we decided to be led by our hearts and to do those things that nourish our soul, where would we be? Would we make different choices? Would we take different steps? Would we talk to those who have not been heard from; would we ignore those who shout? If we think in a mindset of doing what feeds us rather than drain us, perhaps we would find ourselves more at peace and less in turmoil.

I think of times in my life where I have been confronted or ignored. Where my instinct was to argue, where my thoughts told me to shout. But when I stepped back it became clear that what was needed was the opposite, what was needed was to listen. Because when we listen to those who argue, what we often find is that their words are not meant for us at all; their sentiments are those lost inside themselves looking for an outlet. When we understand that what others may do or not really has nothing to do with us at all, then maybe we can make different choices, we can choose what feeds us rather than what someone else seeks from us. Don Miguel Ruiz in "The Four Agreements" tells us not to take it personally. What would happen if we truly embraced that and understood it to be true?

When we are calm, when we are centered, when we focus on the essence of us, when we see with eyes that are soft, the choices we make from that place may be different from what it is we have done in the past. But maybe that's the point. Maybe understanding that what someone else seeks to throw out is not meant for you but meant for them. Maybe believing that what someone else thinks is a reflection of who they are and not an indication of you. Maybe having faith in your own spirit, being grounded in who you are, is really a choice that we make when we embrace that truth. And maybe when we act from that place, the relationships we seek will be truer and more honest because of it.

After all, this is the life.