I have a friend who has just gotten divorced and is moving out of town. She's nervous about going but she also feels free, unencumbered, ready to start something new, ready to move on (literally) and move away from her past. She is hopeful, she is bright-eyed, she has buried the disappointment of a failed marriage and she has decided to pack up and get the hell out of Dodge.
I have a lot of friends and clients who would envy my friend. Who would like the chance to start over. Who would like to change their space, not just their living space but their breathing space. Who would like to head out on the road and leave behind the memories of what they thought they had but didn't, what they hoped would be but wasn't, what they thought could be that isn't.
At the end of divorce or a failed relationship, while we may feel sad and overwhelmed, somewhere deep inside is the seed of hope. There has to be. Somewhere. Because we can't be expected to live our life without fulfilment, and we can't allow those items that throw us off course throw us out of the game altogether. When a relationship is over we want to start over. We want to begin fresh, we want to start something new. Moving to a new city or a new house or a new apartment is a great way to do that; but if you can't actually move, you can still start over with a clean slate.
If every day we woke up and thought we started with a clean slate, what would we do? Would we finally stop believing that we had chosen wrong or thought wrong or ate wrong or exercised wrong or worked wrong or spoke wrong? Would we instead think that we could do more today, we could be kinder today, we could give ourselves a break to see what the day has in store?
I think a clean slate is a gift we can give ourselves; it's a gift we can provide first thing in the morning or the last thing at night or any time in between. Just think "clean slate" and wipe it all away. Wipe away doubt. Wipe away fear. Wipe away the idea that you have to be different than you are. Wipe away disappointment. Wipe away tears. Because if we start fresh today, wherever we wake up, we have no idea where it is we may wind up tomorrow.
After all, this is the life.
- a
I have a lot of friends and clients who would envy my friend. Who would like the chance to start over. Who would like to change their space, not just their living space but their breathing space. Who would like to head out on the road and leave behind the memories of what they thought they had but didn't, what they hoped would be but wasn't, what they thought could be that isn't.
At the end of divorce or a failed relationship, while we may feel sad and overwhelmed, somewhere deep inside is the seed of hope. There has to be. Somewhere. Because we can't be expected to live our life without fulfilment, and we can't allow those items that throw us off course throw us out of the game altogether. When a relationship is over we want to start over. We want to begin fresh, we want to start something new. Moving to a new city or a new house or a new apartment is a great way to do that; but if you can't actually move, you can still start over with a clean slate.
If every day we woke up and thought we started with a clean slate, what would we do? Would we finally stop believing that we had chosen wrong or thought wrong or ate wrong or exercised wrong or worked wrong or spoke wrong? Would we instead think that we could do more today, we could be kinder today, we could give ourselves a break to see what the day has in store?
I think a clean slate is a gift we can give ourselves; it's a gift we can provide first thing in the morning or the last thing at night or any time in between. Just think "clean slate" and wipe it all away. Wipe away doubt. Wipe away fear. Wipe away the idea that you have to be different than you are. Wipe away disappointment. Wipe away tears. Because if we start fresh today, wherever we wake up, we have no idea where it is we may wind up tomorrow.
After all, this is the life.
- a
Love it! Miss you Al. We need to catch up!
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