Aiming too high or too low

We all have our ideas about what we are looking for in someone to share our life with, and those ideas are just as different as the people we are. Some people want more space, some people want no space at all. Some people want someone taller or more educated or more sophisticated. Some people couldn't care less about those traits and instead want someone outdoorsy or handy or quiet. But no matter what you want or what you are looking for, I think it is important to remember not to set your sights too high, but also not set them too low.

When we set our sights too high we often set ourselves up for disappointment, and we may rule out many people who have some, but not all, of our "requirements". We may find that we rule out people for superficial reasons or without giving them a chance. We may lose out on someone for whom we may not be able to check all of our "must haves", but who may have what we most deserve- adoration and love and respect.

At the same time, when we set our sights too low, we devalue who we are and what it is our heart cries out for. When we refuse to allow ourselves the possibility to dream of what we really need, to fight for what we really want, to wait for someone really right, we spend our energy where it is wasted. Setting our sights too low may rule in more individuals, but it may also rule out what we truly need to honor ourselves.

It's a balancing act, this search for love, but it's one worth taking. It's worth taking a chance on someone new, it's worth cutting our losses when it's not working out. It's worth spending time to find out what it is we are looking for, it's worth waiting for that person to come along. It's worth it all, in the end, to find who's waiting for you to find them, and who's been looking for you in return.

After all, this is the life.