Until then

If there was a plan you could not see for someone to come into your life in the future, what would you do until then? If you were guaranteed that the person you wish for, the person you long for, the person you hope for was going to saunter into your life on a date and time down the road, would you spend the time before then just holding your breath and holding your life and holding your present moment in limbo? Or would you feel relief and relax knowing that the right person would be here at exactly the right time for the two of you to meet?

I think we spend so much time wondering about what is coming that we sometimes forget to see what it is we have. We think about what may be or could be without appreciating what is right in front of us. And sometimes it is hard to be alone and have faith, but isn't it harder to think about time wasted just waiting?

I spent a lot of time in my past imagining what I wanted and feeling what it would be like to have love in my life. I also spent a lot of time gnashing my teeth and wringing my hands for the fact that it had not yet happened. And now that I look back, and now that I look forward to what else I want to bring into my life, I've decided that all the gnashing and hand-wringing didn't make anything happen any faster and I wish I had not spent those days in that manner.

I believe there is a time for sadness and wallowing, and I think that when you are there you should bury yourself deep and feel it intensely. But I think there is something to be said for brushing yourself off and picking yourself up and moving forward as you want to and as you hope to have your life lived. Because enjoying the moment for what it has rather than fretting about what it lacks makes today that much more enjoyable as tomorrow may bring you what you hope.

Lesson learned.
-a

Comments

  1. Your last sentence is the aha moment Chicken Soup for the Soul looks for in a story. Sometimes we are so busy looking for the needle in the haystack, we don't realize we are sitting on it.

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