I was listening to this podcast today where Gabrielle Bernstein described one of the 5 steps to spiritual surrender and one of the things she said was "Surrender. Then surrender some more." And that struck me because of conversations I've had with 2 friends recently. One was distraught at the loss of her marriage. She couldn't understand why it was her husband wouldn't see what he had with her and their children and why he chose to leave. A second friend had a difficult relationship with her father and as he was ill and he didn't want to see her because of issues it would cause with his wife, she was heartbroken. And it may seem trite in these two very emotional and devastating situations to give the advice I heard, but actually, I think it's right on. Because both of my friends need to surrender. And then they need to surrender some more.
We can't make someone do what we want or act in a way that we think is right. We can only be responsible for our own actions and we can only live the life that we are walking. We can't change someone's mind if they don't want to listen or have it changed. We can't convince someone that they are doing something wrong if they don't believe it's so. And all of our condemnation and all of our emotional angst that we feel at someone not seeing what we think they should is all wasted energy.
So let go. And then let go some more. Let people walk the path that they choose. You can offer your opinion and then you need to let that opinion lie. They can pick it up and walk with it or they can leave it where you placed it. You can't put it in their hands, you can't tie it to their back. So take back your energy. Take back your strength. Take back all that you are putting out there for someone else to do and bring it inside. Make peace with the fact that you need to walk your own path and you need to do so in your own way; just as other's get to do on their own.
Lesson learned.
- a
We can't make someone do what we want or act in a way that we think is right. We can only be responsible for our own actions and we can only live the life that we are walking. We can't change someone's mind if they don't want to listen or have it changed. We can't convince someone that they are doing something wrong if they don't believe it's so. And all of our condemnation and all of our emotional angst that we feel at someone not seeing what we think they should is all wasted energy.
So let go. And then let go some more. Let people walk the path that they choose. You can offer your opinion and then you need to let that opinion lie. They can pick it up and walk with it or they can leave it where you placed it. You can't put it in their hands, you can't tie it to their back. So take back your energy. Take back your strength. Take back all that you are putting out there for someone else to do and bring it inside. Make peace with the fact that you need to walk your own path and you need to do so in your own way; just as other's get to do on their own.
Lesson learned.
- a
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