I often hear friends or clients at the end of a relationship talk about having to "start over", and it strikes me that that's not really what's going on. You're not going back. You're not trying the same thing again. You're trying something new. You're trying some different. You're starting what's next.
And in thinking about what's next, it seems that there's an optimism to that. There's an excitement and a looking forward and a deciding what steps you want to take and where you want to go. You tried a relationship that didn't work, but that doesn't mean it didn't teach you anything. It taught you some things you want, and some things that you don't. It taught you where you were and who you were in that space, but that doesn't mean you're defined by that.
So at the end, maybe we should be sad but not despondent. Maybe we should grieve for what we thought we had but did not, and when we wipe away those tears, maybe we should take stock of all the lessons we learned and take those with us forward. To our future. To our next step.
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